android 17 [off-screen]: "-folks i'm android 13, look at mah trucker hat!" gero: i was going through a phase! android 18 [o-s]: well, let's say we open them up and get to know our new friend? gero: don't you dare! i am your master and you will do what i say!
Android 18, 17: i- i'm sorry, could you repeat that? i think the ear thing's back. gero: i said, i am your master! and you will do what i-
17: sorry, doc... gero: guuaaggh...! 17: ...just following orders. gero: so... ...could one of you possibly spare one of those senzu- krillin [o-s]: so, does this mean they're on our side? trunks [o-s]: yaaaaagh! [explosion in background] gero: well, guess it's a good thing i backed myself up into this supercomputer.
have to thank wheelo for that. now, what to do with the twins going rogue... how is progress with plan b? [weird noise] that's another seventeen years out at least. [sigh] well, guess it's time for plan c... chi-chi: touch those thai silk curtains and i'll turn one of those hoop earrings into a septum ring! gohan: wow. mom sure is set on filling up korin and yajirobe's wedding registry.
goku: but why do they need six crock pots? and why all these (delicious-looking) bath bombs? i don't even think they have a bathroom! korin always just told me to go over the side. [explosion and screams] ???: excuse me, pardon me, coming through, watch the suit. man, everyone acting a fool... like they've never seen a purple dwarf before. *static*
???: i know, right?! racist as shit. goku [mouth full]: man, shopping makes me hungry! gohan [deadpan]: really, shopping makes you hungry? only shopping? goku: mmhmm. speaking of, how'd your search go, guys? krillin: not great. turns out master roshi is banned from over five hundred victoria's secret locations. i don't get it, how are you not on some kind of a list? "master roshi":you think "master roshi" is my real name? gohan: doesn't victoria's secret specialize in *women's* underwear?
why would korin and yajirobe- -oh... -oh...ooooooh. but which one wears them? ???: so whaddya think? ???: nah. but we can. gohan: hey, so, not to point out the obvious, but, the restaurant is shaking. goku: huh? ehh...
gohan: aww, crapbask-krillin: aww, crapbask-trunks: aww, crapbask- chi-chi: why can't we go anywhere as a group without something blowing up? goku: probably not my fault this time, maybe... terrorists! wait, i can't sense them... androids! androiderists! terroroids! guys, we got a bad case of terroroids!
gohan: c'mon, mom! chi-chi: no! one of the crock pots! goku: so, you guys aren't orgasmic... who are you? red ribbon? i mean, you've got it on your red red ribbon ribbon... ...but, you know what they say about assuming: it makes an ass out of you and ming. ???: scan complete. this guy's dumb as bricks.
[static] goku: say wha..? ???: oh right, your unrefined meatbag ears probably don't understand him. he's introducing himself as android 14. i am android 15. and you... and you...are goku. goku: aaaaahhhh! android 15: and now you're dead!
ok, *rude*! trunks: goku! move! goku: oh, right. trunks: you know, maybe we shouldn't do this here. goku: ooh! ooh! i know a place! gohan: krillin, we should go after them! krillin: should we? gohan: yes!
krillin: okay, but must we? gohan: well, you can come with me, or, you can stay here with my mom. chi-chi: aaaaaaaaagh! krillin: we must! we must!chi-chi: aaaaaaaaagh! gero: update complete. now activating number 13... android 13 [in a deep south accent]: mighty kind o' you, doctor. gero: for crying out loud, we just finished patching that!
13: doc, you can't fix what ain't broke! now... now...where's now...where's my now...where's my trucker now...where's my trucker hat? [banjo version of "imperial march" plays] trunks: no offense goku, but... ...why the arctic?
goku: what? you're fine, you've got a jacket. trunks: well yeah, but there are more deserts than we can count, and you chose the arctic! goku: uh, y-you got a jacket... 15: my database says: 15: my database says:you's a bitch! trunks: i doubt that's what it actually sa- trunks: i doubt that's what it actually sa-agh! [grunting] goku: trunks!
your jacket is weighing you down! huh? wah! [grunts] trunks: hey goku, if and when we make it out of this, please don't tell my father there were two more androids. 13 [o-s]: uh, to be fair, you'd'a been wrong anyway... 13 [o-s]: uh, to be fair, you'd'a been wrong anyway...'cause there's three! trunks: aaaauugh!
13: howdy, there! i'm android 13. look at mah trucker hat. goku: look-y trunks! more 'roids. trunks: you're kidding me! are there any more of you that we don't know about? 13: nah, just us... ...plus the green one in the sub-lab. trunks: enough! i have had it with these monkey-fighting androids,
in this monday-to-friday timeline! aaauugh! 13: well son, looks like thirteen is your unlucky number. goku: i don't believe in stuperstitions! 13 [incredulous]: ...how in the blazes did gero have so much trouble killing you? goku: i'm very stubborn. 13: hmm. goku: oh hey, he's actually really strong. waaahhh!
[underwater] waaahhhhh 13: careful, son! you might catch a death of cold! goku: catch *this* cold! 13: my trucker hat! ya plum done gone daggone did it now, son. goku: who and the wha- aaaaahhhh! (ah.) (hope trunks is having better luck.)
trunks: hi-yah! aw, why did i even bring this?! (wait, why did i bring this?) (we were shopping before-) augh! 15: a'ight 14, give it back. trunks: [startled squeal] yah! ya can't dodge my t.h. deathbomb!
goku: does the "t.h." stand for- 13: trucker hat, yes! goku: not my first guess. waugh! gero: yes! yes! this is my moment! oh, what now!? wuh? awakened evil: for thousands of years, i laid dormant!
who has disturbed my- goku: hey, best buddy! vegeta: oh, it's you. explain, idiot. trunks: no no no! goku: we found three more androids. trunks: da-a-mmit! vegeta: three whole androids, huh? pretty sure that makes *eight*.
hmm, never letting the boy live this one down. 13: well, if it ain't the prince! good day, your majesty! i'd tip my hat to ya, but i lost it! vegeta: look, i'm a little late to the game here, what's your deal? 13: see here, the kind dr. gero deemed us, in his own words, "defective."
leaving us on the proverbial shelf until, well... ...he gone plum run outta options. goku: so, what's your detective? 13: he could not quite tolerate my dulcet tones, 13: he could not quite tolerate my dulcet tones, my choice in vernacular, 13: he could not quite tolerate my dulcet tones, my choice in vernacular,and my particular method of... 13: he could not quite tolerate my dulcet tones, my choice in vernacular,and my particular method of...ar-ti-cu-lation. goku: also, you talk funny. what 'bout him?
vegeta: alright, but what about the small one? is it 'cause he's purple? 13: okay, racist, if ya must know; it's 'cause he's got a drinking problem. 15 [o-s]: hey, it's only a problem when i run out! 13: we don't like to talk about it. now! i believe we have some business to attend to! id est, layin' three corpses upon this here glacier.
14! 15! 15: you got it, boss man! you forget you saw this. 13: round two, fleshlightsâ„¢! trunks: [grunts] krillin: so, we just needed to be here didn't we? gohan: yeah, ok... krillin: couldn't even stop for a jacket!
just had to *beeline* it for the arctic. gohan: ok, krillin, i get it! we're not helping. i just... ...needed some space from my mom. krillin: eh, it's all right. wanna have a snowball fight? gohan: probably not a good time... krillin: no, no, you-you're right. vegeta: aaaaaahhhh!
ooophh! hey! wanna see something cool?! 15: yeah, ok. vegeta: yeeaaaaaauuuughh.... ...yaaaaaaauuuugh! trunks: (oh right.) (super saiyan.) aaaaaauuuuugh!
goku: oh, right... super saiyan. gaaaaauugh! gero: oh shit... gero: oh shit...super saiyan. gaaaaaaahhh! gohan: uh, why did it take them so long to do that? krillin: you know, i stopped asking that question a long time ago. vegeta: so, are you ready to die, android?
are- are you- does that even do anything for you? 15: not anymore... oh, god! krillin: that's right goku, send him back to arkansas! 13 [o-s]: it's pronounced "ar-kansas", ya idjit. gohan: and consider my pet peeved! gohan: piccolo, help!
holy cow, that worked! 2nd awakened evil: for thousands of years, i laid dormant! who has disturbed my- piccolo: oh hey, goku, what's up? goku: androids. piccolo: neat! mind if i take a spin? 13: ah ah ah hoo hooooo! goku: ah, 'cause you spun him around. 13 [o-s]: ow!
goku: clever. piccolo: thanks, i was practicing that one under the ice for the last half- you know what, never mind. 13: now, i don't mean to make this about your color or your race, but you'd better hightail it out of here before you get hurt, boy. piccolo: you know, it feels like it's about *both* those things when you end it with the word "boy". 15: c'mon short-stack. that the best you got? ha haa! super saiyan or not, you're still just a- bitch!
did you just throw a mothaf***in do- [static] vegeta: looks like the countdown's just about over you redneck... uhhh... trunks: hey guys! i did that thing again where i slice my opponent in two and they don't react until- vegeta: i did it first, you're not special! trunks [o-s]: b-but you don't even have a sword... 13: 14 and 15 have been destroyed?! goooood! piccolo: i feel like we should be stopping this.
goku: nah, i want a good fight! krillin: he's 'roiding out! gero [o-s]: excellent. android 13 has reached his ultimate, final, pinnacle form! unstoppable! blue! and completely taciturn. super android 13: hurrrgh! gero [o-s]: perfect!
goku: vegeta, he stole your 'do! vegeta: i'll kill him! ah! oh no... [screaming] trunks: i got you fath-aahh! vegeta: hahahahahahaha. [grunt] idiot.
someone stupid get in my way! krillin: what the--? kami and nail: boom-chika-ah boom-chicka-ah boom-boom-boom-boom green d- piccolo: (what are you doing?) kami: (we're trying to amp you up!) piccolo: (well, it's distracting!)
all: (oh shit mothaf*cka!) goku: my turn! gero: weakness... identified! 13: hurrgh! goku: hey, what are ya- -agh!! [fading echo] [several years later...] gohan: all right, goten, it's your job to chuck these as hard as you can
so i can be all trained up to face off against dad in the tournament! now stand behind that line and- goten? (what was i doing here?) [...back to the present] goku: aaaaaaaaugh- [faint screeching] [high pitched] he punched me in the dick! why?!
why did he punch me in the dick?! vegeta [snarky]: not so funny now, is it, kakarot? krillin: is goku gonna be okay? vegeta: get the f*** off me! goku: n-now i know what you're thinki- auuugh! and the answer may surpri- (aw man...) eeeeeee!
gohan: hey! why don't you pick on someone your own size? ehhh... well, clearly not me. (welp, if you can't beat 'em...) (bomb 'em.) eh, maybe one of those battleball players? i mean, not that i watch sports, i havebetter things to do with my life. i feel like this is a one-sided conversation. [growling] gero [o-s]: 13, if you'd kindly turn around ,and eliminate son goku...
13: rrraugh! gohan: dad, no! bbluuauugh! goku: good job, son! gero [o-s]: hmm, unexpected, but not altogether unpleasant. let's try again shall w-? goku: ow! vegeta: nobody is killing that idiot but me! goku [o-s]: aw, you *do* care.
gero [o-s]: agh, fine, finish off vegeta, then son goku. [squeak] [vegeta screaming] narrator: and that's when the prince realized that when you grab a bull by the horns, sometimes, he'll take you for a ride. {thwack}[vegeta screaming] goku: keep it up guys! you're doing great! gero [o-s]: yes, good, now hurry up and get back to so-
oh my non-existent god! trunks: hey! you big blue bastard! i'm a time traveler from 17 years in the future. and you don't exist there. you know why? well, besides multiverse theory, it's because you die, right here, by my sword! narrator: and that's when the time traveler realized that his sword was about as useless... ...as a screen door on a submarine. [trunks screaming] [whistling mahna mahna]
gero [o-s]: good! great! now stop playing around with the rabble and focus your efforts on killing so- gero [o-s]: good! great! now stop playing around with the rabble and focus your efforts on killing so--n of a whore! narrator: and that's when the green man realized that when you suplex a robot, you better... oh, what the hell am i doing? *footsteps receding* super android 13: bwuu yoo yoo yoo yoo yoo yoo yoo yoo rawharaa! (credit goes to yushnizzo) krillin: oh right.. spirit saiyan... what?
gero [o-s]: kill son goku! kill son goku! kill son goku before it's too late! [goku screaming] gero [o-s]: oh, this bodes poorly... jesus christ!!!!!!! narrator: and that's when the robot realized that he was as dead as a... robot. because robots are technically not alive by the traditional definition of- d'these people even give a damn anymore?
[scoffs] i swear they stopped tryin' after season 2. [super android 13 screaming] [explosion] master roshi: heeellloooo nurse! krillin: man, catching vegeta really f***ed my shit up! how about you, goku? you seem fine. goku: yup! senzu beans healed my nuts up good!
chi-chi: thank god. krillin: hey hey, that's great! so, you got any to share? goku: i kinda needed a few... trunks: i'm glad you're all fine, but it does concern me that there are apparently more androids out there. krillin: actually, i had a thought about that. gero: well, that was a total bust. i suppose i'll just continue nursing plan b. what's another 17 years? i'm not going anywhere. [krillin talking in distance]
wait, what is that noi- krillin: wow! danger will robinson. gero [o-s]: oh, *no*...! *violin outtro* *now with banjo* piccolo: is it over? vegeta: not 'til the fish jumps. [piccolo clears his throat] [vegeta clears his throat]
piccolo: soo... ...what were you doing in the arctic? vegeta: what were you doing in the arctic? piccolo: i don't have a place to live, what's your excuse? vegeta: look green man, if you must know, i was just trying to find a place where i can be alone for a littlebit and have some "me time." turns out, the arctic wasn't the best solution. piccolo: yeah, it would, uh, seem that way. vegeta: yeah, yeah, it would. piccolo: so what do you do for fu-?
fish: fin! piccolo: oh, i get it. vegeta: it's 'cause he's a fish. 13: well now, that sure was a doozy of a movie. if y'all enjoyed, maybe, consider likin' and subscribin' if youwant to watch something else by these folks. check out their gaming channel or maybetheir final fantasy 7 machinabridged. or, if you're interested in the voice of yours truly... [voice changes] you can check out my youtube channel "ricepirate newgrounds", or honestly just
look up "ricepirate" it's easier that way, or you can alwaysscream at my face over twitter @ricepiratemick hey, thanks for watching and be sure to clickaround to get your fill of team four star. i know i am. ( í¡~ íœê– í¡â°)
